Cardinals/Mets, game 3

Hernandez has dropped by the Keith compound to watch a Cardinals/Mets game, live from St. Louis, which is going to be underwater soon. Nothing is more fascinating than baseball commentary, so we'll just make random observations and probably end up insulting the hell out of each other.

8:10 p.m. KEITH: Apparently the Mets make the most inexperienced guy on their squad carry a pink 'Hello Kitty' backpack to the dugout. Hernandez wonders what's in it. I'm guessing Pedro's midget.

8:36 p.m. KEITH: The immortal Pedro Martinez just gave up a 3-run homer to Troy Glaus, the Cardinals new 3rd baseman. In case you weren't aware, I'm a Cardinals fan and Hernandez a Mets fan.

The homer was followed by a single. Pedro looks like someone pooped in his Hello Kitty bag.

9:08. Hernandez ain't typin, but he's talking funny shit. He just had a baby, and he's talking about how he's already watched 'Grindhouse' with her. Remember this post in 16 years when she hacks up your neighbor.

9:25. Rain delay. Hernandez correctly calls that they're switching to 'Beer Money', which he wrote about here. We're trying to figure out how to get co-host Julie over here. Hernandez: 'She got the platinum pussy'.

9:35. Still Julie.

K: (nodding) "She's kind of a bitch."

H: (nodding) "Yeah....I love her.

Julie is Julie Alexandria. Hur-aRRRRRRrrrrrrrrr. (Did I spell that right?)

Hernandez: "She's a Jew from Queens. That's what she is."

10:00. Rain is over! We watched three episodes of 'Yacht Rock'. It holds up.

10:15. Uh-oh. hernandez found the heroin. We'll try this again some other time...