If you're a football fan, or a breathing human being, you've probably heard that Brett Favre is considering un-retiring and wants to come back to play another year, because he's a media whore.
Brett Favre is an excellent quarterback, and had a great season last year. And at his Wilford Brimley-esque age, he's still probably a better quarterback than their other option, Aaron Rodgers. I asked a friend what he thought about Favre coming back, and he wrote this:
"I think the whole situation has gotten completely out of control. both he and the Packers are playing right into the media's hand and they are running wild with the story. i can understand the Packers being tired of his yo-yo act...am i retiring or not...but after the season that he had last year i think they should take him back. when he is there you know you have a championship caliber QB playing all 16 games. Rodgers has been injured 2x in the limited time he has played. i also don't see Rodgers getting them to the big dance or at least to the NFC Championship game this year like Favre did last year. either way...i hope they figure it out soon. i'm tired of hearing about it all. "
And so am I. Maybe he's an attention-loving douchebag because he was in "There's Something About Mary" ten years ago, but just because the media gets their diapers in a bunch over you doesn't mean football fans do.
There have also been rumors that he may go to the Vikings or Bears, who are the Packers' hated rivals. Wow. If he pulled that noose around his neck, he'd deserve it. Very few sports fans are dedicated like the Cheeseheads. If I were a defensive lineman for the Packers, I'd take the late-hit 15-yard penalty on every single play.
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Apparently other Americans feel differently. Lady and gentlemen, feast your ears upon the best Queen cover band working in our nation. They're called The Bohemian Rhapsody Orchestra, and the lead singer is a dead ringer for the guy deep in Queens who does the art detail on your shitty van. But miraculously he sounds just like Freddie Mercury.
(Which reminds me--I just watched a Journey concert on VH1 Classic with their new lead singer. He sounds *just* like Steve Perry. It's scary, and eventually depressing, because I now realize that Journey will keep playing 'Open Arms' until I turn 45.)
Anyway, it turns out that this particular Freddie Mercury grease monkey who fronts the BRO is a hu-uge Green Bay Packers fan. And he shows it off in embarrassing detail.
On their myspace page, listen to the 4th song -- 'We Will Rock You GB Packers'. I wish I were lying, but the first line is "BUDDY YOU'RE A MAN NAMED BRETT FAVRE..." There's more, but my laughing drowned it out.
The line between utter stupidity and genius is thin, and probably curvy. The Bohemian Rhapsody Orchestra tap dance back and forth over this line like a drunk driver blowing .025. Enjoy.
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3 comments:
What friend wrote that about the Pack? They better not bring that lame shit around here.
1. GB management is rightfully sick of being jerked around by Favre. Admittedly it's a little late to get religion now after enabling him for years, but he needs to know he's not above the team.
2. They feel they already made their best run with him last year when they had the NFC Championship at home in the cold and lost, partly because of his killer (Queen) INT in OT. Let's face it; he sucked the previous two years. Last season was the anamoly. He'll probably suck again for whatever team he winds up with this season. And he WILL wind up with another team.
3. Most importantly, they're going to lose Aaron Rodgers after this season so they need to find out if he's worth re-investing in. They won't find that out with him on the bench behind St. Brett. If they don't find out if he's a capable starter that's just gross incompetence as an organization and a complete waste of a No. 1 draft pick. That shit can set a franchise back years.
4. Fuck Brett Favre.
5. That Bohemian Rhapsody Orchestra stuff is GREAT! I noticed they're from St. Louis, which makes me wonder if Keith's brother is in the band. What the hell has that guy been up to?
Can't believe I spelled anomaly wrong. Why won't Blogger let you edit comments? Pricks.
Did you see Steve Young's comments (I saw them at Deadspin)? They were pretty enlightening. Steve points out that he used to be great at football and now he isn't great at anything. You hear that Favre? If you retire, you will suck at everything you do for the rest of your life.
'Anamole'. Is that like guacamole made with ovaries?
BRO: My brother is not in the band. Ironically, my brother's ex-roomate from N. Cackalacca is in the band, but he's from the Bronx. You know. Where queens come from?
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